This issue covers: 7 Signs you’re experiencing an identity shift Warning flags that you might be in crisis mode 3 Business Frameworks to turn Personal Transitions into Platforms for Growth:
During the past week, I launched my website (finally!)… and the very next day, I began the process of completely overhauling it. I participated in a design thinking workshop for a startup building a solution to support other founders with the wind down of a failed venture. I drafted a workshop I’ll be facilitating for a community of women who have been recently laid off. I supported a friend through a tricky return-to-work experience post-maternity leave. What do all of these things have in common? Transition. And not just any transitions… transitions of identity. Not all transitions are identity shifts. Major life transitions, like a move or job change, can sometimes catalyze an identity shift, but that isn’t always the case. A new role may initially feel like a big change, but if it doesn’t alter your self-perception or value system in a meaningful way, it’s a job transition rather than a full-scale identity shift. A relocation can change your environment and shift your relationships without necessarily impacting your sense of belonging within certain social groups. So what’s the difference? A life transition significantly impacts what you do and how you do it. An identity shift impacts who you are, how you relate to the world and how you feel about that. These shifts happen throughout the course of our lives. Child to adolescent Only child to sibling Student to professional Single to married Becoming a parent Losing a parent Entering midlife Founder to leader Founder to closure Full house to empty nest Valued contributor to laid off pariah Married to divorced Addicted to sober Healthy to chronically ill Chronic pain to pain-free Success to failure & back to success Lifelong career to retirement Retirement to second career Whether or not they’re welcome, transitions and identity shifts can both be uncomfortable. Change always is. But with an identity shift, it’s almost as if there are two versions of you existing in the same reality — the you that you’ve been up to now and the you that you’re becoming. 7 Signs you’re experiencing an identity shift: 1. You feel a disconnect from your past self. Old habits, values or interests no longer resonate in the same way. 2. You notice a shift in values or priorities. Things that once felt really important no longer hold the same weight. You feel a pull towards new priorities. 3. You feel a sense of dynamic change and unease. The experience of outgrowing your current identity before fully growing into your new one is uncomfortable & unsettling. You can feel the change happening & you’re eager to get to the other side of it. 4. Your social dynamics are shifting. People who once fit into your life and lifestyle might not feel compatible anymore. Relationships can feel stale because they don’t hold space for who you know you’re growing into. 5. You are craving new experiences. You feel an urge to try new things, explore different roles or pursue new interests. 6. You are outgrowing your inner dialogue. You’re questioning what you want and who you’re becoming and the familiar answers no longer feel authentic to your experience or your desires. 7. You feel a sense of authentic belonging Within the discomfort of the shift, there are moments of undeniable alignment. You know intuitively that you’re moving closer to your true self rather than conforming to past expectations or roles. And, if you’re paying attention, you’re getting signs from the universe that you’re right. Even with that validation though, this is hard stuff. You’re growing out of an old version and into a new and if you aren’t intentional, you can lose yourself in the midst of that transformation. How to prevent an identity shift from becoming an identity crisis So now you know what a shift looks like, but what does an identity crisis look like, and how can you prevent a shift from turning into a crisis? Both identity shifts & identity crises involve a sense of disorientation and a sense of loss. That sense of disorientation fades as you acclimate to and find yourself within your new reality The sense of loss may stay with you. You grieve the old identity, even if the new one is welcome, and hold onto a sense of nostalgia for a version of yourself that you once held sacred. Beyond that, there are more differences than similarities. Whereas an identity shift is characterized by a feeling of personal evolution, and acceptance of change… an identity crisis is marked by a struggle to regain a clear sense of self in the face of a change one is unwilling to accept. Identity shift is acceptance, Identity crisis is resistance. Identity shift is opening, Identity crisis is gripping. Identity shift feels like becoming, Identity crisis feels like unraveling. Warning flags that you might be in crisis mode: 🚩 Experience Shift: You’re feeling the discomfort and uncertainty of adapting to and finding your place within a new reality. Crisis: You’re feeling disoriented, rudderless & uncertain about your future direction. 🚩 Emotions Shift: You’re feeling excitement and curiosity about a gradual, though not always smooth, progression. Crisis: You’re feeling a sense of urgency or desperation to “figure it out” so you can regain a sense of stability. 🚩 Intentionality Shift: While not always planned, a shift is a more intentional process in which a choice is made to adopt a new self-concept or lifestyle. Crisis: A crisis happens within a perceived loss of control. You feel as though the loss of identity is happening to you. 🚩 Scope Shift: A shift involves significant changes, but usually in specific areas of life. Parts of your identity are evolving to accommodate the New You, but your entire sense of self isn’t disrupted Crisis: A crisis affects multiple, if not all, aspects of your life. You feel as though your whole sense of self has been up-ended. You “don’t know who [you are] anymore”. We can’t always plan ahead for big life transitions but we can take steps once we’re in them to set ourselves up for a successful shift and prevent the onset of crisis. You know from past issues that I love to apply familiar business frameworks to enhance opportunities for personal growth (like Cycle Time)… In that spirit, these are three business frameworks to prevent a personal transition from triggering an identity crisis and to turn it into a platform for growth. Choose one that feels like the best fit for you and explore from there. 1. Conduct a Personal SWOT Analysis A SWOT analysis is a strategic planning tool used to assess an organization’s Strengths, Weaknesses, Opportunities and Threats. Creating a SWOT analysis helps a business understand their internal capabilities (strengths and weaknesses) and their external environment (opportunities and threats) so they can make informed and strategic choices in light of prevailing conditions. A Personal SWOT analysis mirrors the traditional business SWOT by evaluating an individual’s S, W, O, Ts in the context of an impending or evolving transition. Just as businesses use a SWOT to make informed strategic decisions, you can leverage this tool during times of change to harness your resources, avoid pitfalls and leverage your strengths. By mapping out each element, you can approach transitions more strategically, make more informed decisions about how to navigate them and be intentional about what facets of your identity you want to preserve versus which ones you’re ready to evolve in order to thrive in your new reality. What to do: 1. Divide a piece of paper into four equal quadrants, labeled S, W, O and T respectively. 2. Spend 20 minutes to 2 hours (!) filling each quadrant, using the time
3. Extract actionable insights from your SWOT lists. Harness your Strengths Identify which of your strengths will help you navigate your transition and thrive in your new reality. Address your Weaknesses Pinpoint the weaknesses that might hinder your ability to evolve into your desired future state. Leverage your Opportunities Look for opportunities that align with the transformation you are working to make. Mitigate the Threats Take note of the external threats that you can impact through intentional mitigation. 4. Create an Action Plan Combine these insights into a clear plan of action: Focus on maximizing Strengths in areas where they can have the greatest impact. Develop a plan to improve or manage key Weaknesses, like seeking support, building new skills, or delegating where possible. Create actionable steps to pursue the Opportunities, using your strengths to maximize your chances of success. Develop proactive strategies to minimize or avoid the Threats, such as building a support network or identifying a backup plan. With the intentionality of this approach, you align your next steps with your new direction, mitigate the feelings of desperation & disorientation and reassert your agency so you’re not at the mercy of things happening to you. That pulls you out of crisis mode and puts you back in charge of who you’re becoming. 2. Utilize the Gap Analysis Framework A Gap Analysis in business is a strategic tool used to identify the difference between a company’s current performance and its desired future performance. By pinpointing the gaps between the Current State and the Desired State, businesses can develop actionable plans to close the gap, like improving processes, acquiring resources, or revitalizing culture. A Personal Gap Analysis can work similarly for navigate a successful transition by helping you assess where you are now (current self) versus where you want to be (future self). This method allows you to identify gaps in skills, habits, values or relationships that need to be addressed in order to align with your evolving identity. An intentional exercise to roadmap specific actions that can bridge the gaps can provide clarity & direction during times of uncertainty, increasing the likelihood you'll thrive in your new reality and preventing your transition from spiraling into an identity crisis. What to do: 1. Create a table with the following categories (or swap for ones that feel more relevant):
2. Create two adjacent columns for Current State and Desired Future State. 3. Now, write down a list of reflections on your current state (how you see yourself now, including your skills, roles, and values) and your desired future state (who you want to become after the transition). 4. Next, map out the gaps between Current & Desired, and create specific actions to bridge those gaps. Compare the Current State and Future State in each category and list out the specific gaps between them. “What’s missing?”, “What needs to change?” 5. Rank the gaps you identified by importance or impact. “Which of these gaps are most critical to close first?” For your priority gaps, brainstorm specific steps that are realistic & measurable. (Use the SMART goals framework.) 6. Set a timeline. Attach specific time expectations to each actionable step. AND PUT THEM IN YOUR CALENDAR. Please. 7. Monitor and adjust. Calendar regular check-ins to hold yourself accountable to closing the gaps. If you’re taking the steps and the gap isn’t closing, identify other approaches and shift your strategy. 8. Celebrate the shrinkage. As your gaps start to close, notice and celebrate. That’s current you getting closer to the you you want to be. 3. Personal Balanced Scorecard Framework The Balanced Scorecard is a strategic management tool used by businesses to track performance across four key areas: Financial, Customer, Internal Processes, and Learning and Growth. Businesses set goals and metrics for each category and examine how actual performance in each area impacts all the others. Companies use this tool to measure and manage business performance holistically, ensuring all aspects of the organization are aligned and optimized. A Personal Balanced Scorecard can function similarly by tracking key areas of life for an individual during a transition to attentively manage & intentionally pursue a desired outcome. It gives you a framework to assess your progress and performance at a high level and prevents you from over-focusing on one aspect of life or identity during a major transition while neglecting or derailing all of the others. What to do: 1. Identify the 4 Key Life Areas you want to track Possibility: Personal Growth, Relationships/Family, Health, Career 2. Define one or two specific goals for each area that are relevant to how you want to successfully navigate this transition. What do you want your life to look like in each area on the other side? 3. Establish success metrics by determining how you will measure progress in each area. Concrete, trackable metrics are ideal. 4. Monitor your progress within and across each category, examining the ways in which each area affects the others. Reflect on how progress in personal growth can impact communication and connection with loved ones. Consider how success in prioritizing health can impact productivity, creativity & motivation in your professional life. Examine how work-related decisions impact your capacity to pursue growth opportunities, prioritize well-being and cultivate meaningful personal connections. Explore how the health of your social circle impacts mental resilience, motivation & commitment in other areas. By recognizing the interconnectedness of these areas, you can anticipate how under-performance or neglect in one sector can trigger imbalances or stress in others, potentially escalating into a full-blown identity crisis. Regular reflection can help you maintain accountability and ensure that actions remain integrated, reducing the risk of tunnel vision, burnout and crisis during times of transition. In times of transition, change can feel overwhelming, but it’s important to remember that even the discomfort of change is better than being stuck. Transitions are going to happen throughout your life, some that you welcome, some that you dread, some you’ll create & some you’ll ride out. Each of them is an opportunity to explore and adapt to a new reality and intentionally evolve your identity in order to thrive there. The alternative is to resist and when you resist something inevitable, you end up in existential conflict and identity crisis. Tools like the Personal Gap Analysis, SWOT, and Balanced Scorecard can help you navigate transitions with clarity and intention so you can embrace growth, rather than fight it. And with that, you can step into a more authentic version of yourself, one that you might not have predicted, one that you might not have even wanted, but one that is set up to grow & thrive in your new reality. You’ve got this. Reply to this email to let me know which of these frameworks feels like the best fit for you and forward it to a friend going through a transition of their own. Thank you for being here and have a great week! xx Nicole |
Straightforward strategies to pursue your purpose, accelerate your growth, show up as your whole self, increase higher order thinking and align your time with your values. What to try. Why it Works. For When it Matters.
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